Ok, so there are certain things that I have no problem apologizing for. If I accidentally open the door on you, spill something on your shirt or hit you with my ginormous purse as I walk by, I will say I am sorry. I have no problem admitting when I do something wrong (although my hubs would argue otherwise). I will not, however, apologize for something that doesn't deserve an apology. Such as:
To the rich bitch in the Lexus who cut into my lane and
almost killed me on the interstate…sorry not sorry that I was secretly wishing
that your husband was cheating on you and that big rock on your hand.
To the rude waitress that took care of my to-go lunch
order…sorry not sorry that you got zero tip...maybe you should have smiled and
asked how my day was going...Then you would have realized what a fabulous tipper I am. Sucks to be you.
To my sorry-ass-hypochondriac-calls-out-of-work-3-times-a-week coworker, (we will call her Molly), sorry not sorry that I hope you get
fired. And also, sorry not sorry that I take every opportunity to throw you
under the bus…see what happens when you’re not a team player?!
To the poor girl at Rue21 who had to carry all of my clothes
to the dressing room. Sorry not sorry because I had to run back to the floor
for 17 other items, and my arms were starting to hurt.
To the scumbag from Hungry Howie's pizza...Sorry not sorry
that I got you fired...that's why you don't spit on people's cars when you are
delivering food.
To my fellow beachgoers…Sorry not sorry that the only reason
that I go into the ocean is when I have to pee.
To the person who ends up parking next to me…sorry not sorry that I am terrible at parking, and I’m probably more than halfway in your spot…I have better things to do than to fit my car between 2 white lines.
To the woman taking up the entire aisle in Walgreens…Sorry not sorry that I rudely announced that because of you, I was going to have to walk all the way around the long way just to get to the register. Maybe you should learn how to share the aisle.
To anyone around me when I am due for my period…Sorry not sorry that I am a miserable bitch, I have zero time to listen to your problems and I will most likely make you super uncomfortable by crying over a broken fingernail. PMS is no joke—you have been warned.
Guess what tomorrow is guys??? The last day of our challenge!!! Ok, well not really, because I may also be participating in the August 1st VLOG event, also hosted by the lovely Allie, Juliette & Faith, so that should be fun!!
No comments:
Post a Comment